


Silhouettes

by Summer_Dusk



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Gen, Grima slowly taking over, Lots of Angst, lots of character deaths
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 09:51:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14767313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Summer_Dusk/pseuds/Summer_Dusk
Summary: Doomed timeline AU in which Robin wants to disappear for good after killing her best friend, but when she returns Falchion to Ylisstol a certain princess refuses to let her dear auntie go away.





	Silhouettes

**Author's Note:**

> This whole fic was inspired by the same named song from the band "Of Monsters and Men". I was listening to it and I started to imagine the story like a music video. I had a specific scenario in mind for each strophe, which unfortunately was not in chronological order when I listened to the song, but I tried my best to piece everything together into a coherent story and to give the reader enough hints of the timeline with Lucina's age, the used tenses, P.O.V. etc.  
> The lullaby meantioned later on is called "Song of the Sea", from the same named movie. I used that one because I really liked how it sounded, the lyrics don't have any connection to the story.  
> I'm still convinced that this would have been better if drawn, but I can't draw for the life of me, so writing it had to be.  
> Despite that, I really love how everything turned out and I hope you guys will like it too! :)

_It's hard letting go_  
_I'm finally at peace, but it feels wrong_  
_Slow I'm getting up_  
_My hands and feet are weaker than before_

She breathes in and out. Panting. This fight is over, she tells herself. It is over. One time, two times, three times. It is over. It is over.   
She forces herself to get up from the ground, her legs still trembling from the exhaustion. The sun rises in the distance. It is the most radiant dawn she has seen in her life – as if the world wants to thank her for saving it.  
Blood drips from Falchion’s hilt, as she steps closer onto the castle’s edge. She does not look around as she passes by hair as red as the stains on her sword. Does not want to see the dead bodies the fight has left in its wake. Friends, family… even the monster she just killed bears the face of a loved one.  
She tries to strengthen the grip around her sword, to hold onto the last bits of sanity and comfort it has to offer her in this moment – but her hands are weak and her legs refuse to carry her any further.  
Her heart weighs heavy in her chest.  
The world is at peace now, isn’t it?  
So why does she not feel at ease? Accomplished even? It is what they had set out to do, was it not?  
  
She tries to straighten her posture, to greet the new day with dignity, but instead she falls onto her knees, overwhelmed by sadness and guilt and emptiness.  
It feels wrong.  
  
This does not feel like victory at all.

 

* * *

 

  
_And you are folded on the bed_  
_Where I rest my head_  
_There's nothing I can see_  
_Darkness becomes me_

 

Robin had not dared to look into Lissa’s eyes as she told her about what had happened to Chrom, Sumia, Frederick and the soldiers that had been with them.  
She held her beloved friend’s sword in both her hands as she reached it with limp arms towards the young woman.  
“You… should give this to Lucina.”  
  
Lissa shook her head ever so slowly, not wanting the reality of this gesture to set in.  
“No, this can’t be…!” Only a whisper escaped between the gentle fingers with which she had covered her mouth. “Chrom, my brother…!”  
She didn’t bother hiding the tears that followed next.  
  
Robin stood there, eyes glued on the Falchion, not able to offer her the comfort she needed.  
She knew Lissa was in great pain, having lost a brother, a sister-in-law, a caretaker and many others, but Robin's mind was occupied with other things: she needed to leave as soon as possible. The people around her were not safe anymore. She and Chrom had killed Validar – and for a faint moment she had lulled herself to believing she was safe now; that there was no one left who had power over her body and mind.  
  
She had been wrong. Oh, so wrong. Only a fleeting moment of false security had been needed by that demon to creep into her and drive the lightning into Chrom’s heart.  
It is not your fault, he had assured her in his dying moments. But of course it had been, dear friend. Who else would be at fault, if not the person whose hand it was that had killed you?  
  
“Give her the sword, Lissa, and tell her I’m sorry.”  
  
Lissa shook her head. “You should do it, Robin. She had known this mission was dangerous. She was anxious all the time. Didn’t eat, didn’t sleep – until a few days ago and you were gone for weeks. If she finds out that everyone died, then seeing you will be the only source of comfort for her.”  
  
Robin felt the sickness seep into her stomach when she heard those words.  
“I can’t. I need to leave.”  
She? A source of comfort after she killed that innocent girl’s father? She could not do that.  
  
“But why?” Lissa asked with stifled voice.  
  
And Robin dared meet her gaze and the blonde woman could see the shame and guilt in her amber eyes. They had never told Lissa about Robin’s connection with Grima, about the meaning of the mark on the back of her hand, but she had always been a perceptive one. Even if she had not shown it, at times Robin had felt that Lissa knew more about everything then she had let on.  
And now, in this moment, she was able to read the tactician’s emotions like an open book - because Robin let her. Because she did not want to hide the truth, yet, she found herself unable to speak it aloud.  
Lissa did not want to see it though.  
She lowered her eyes in defeat, trying to dry the ever flowing tears with her hands.  
  
“Lucina is in her room.” She just said and turned her back.  
  
“Lissa, I’m so…”  
  
Lissa did not want to hear her apologies. They would make whatever she had figured out moments ago real and she refused to see a murderer in someone who had stayed by their family’s side for so long. Instead she dashed away.  
  
Robin was left behind with a sword that held the dreams and hopes and responsibilities of a loving father and a king in her hands; and her own heart that felt even heavier now than it had on the way back to Ylisstol.  
  
It was late at night when Robin opened the door to the ten-year-old’s room. Her quarter lay mostly in darkness, except for the moonlight that was able to illuminate the room as the curtains had not been drawn closed. Maybe Lucina had left the curtains open so that she was able to see outside, always waiting, always expecting her parents’ return.  
  
Maybe delivering the dreadful news was a just punishment, Robin thought to herself, as she closed the heavy door behind her.  
The child was sleeping folded on the bed, knees drawn close to the tummy and the hands laid together on the pillow. Her steady breath was almost inaudible.  
  
There she was, innocently dreaming, not knowing what news would await her upon awakening. Robin stepped close to the bed and kneeled down next to it. She put Falchion on the ground to her side and rested her upper body on the edge of Lucina’s bed while she watched the child sleep.  
  
“I’m so sorry.” Robin whispered and stretched her hand out and petted Lucina’s gleaming blue hair. The ten-year-old smiled softly at the touch and Robin was grateful that she did not wake up. She did not want to steal Lucina’s last night of peaceful slumber.  
  
_I’m a monster_ , Robin thought and laid her head on the bed. _You deserve the truth, Lucina. But don’t worry yourself with petty revenge. I will make sure to disappear from this world, so that no one will have to suffer ever again.  
  
_ She had played with this thought long before this day, she remembered, as her eyes focused onto the dark nothingness in one of the empty corners in Lucina’s room. It was when she had first found out about Validar’s and Grima’s influence over her, back then when he told her about her lineage and purpose.  
It had been a most obvious solution – and one Chrom had wanted to hear nothing about. He had promised her it would work out, they would work it out. Kept her company, made sure she was always with friends and laughed and lived and was reminded of her worth.  
Tears stung into her eyes when she realized that it was his kindness that had ultimately cost his life.   
_You should have just left me in that field to rot._   
The darkness she had laid her gaze upon seemed to expand in the small room the more she focused on it. When it threatened to engulf her she shut her eyes close and tried to think of something bright, like the morning sun. She felt silly for being scared of the dark, she was an adult after all.  
When she felt an unfamiliar mocking laugh at the back of her mind, her whole body stiffened.  
_Leave me alone!_ she begged and opened her eyes again, but the shadows had not retreated, not even with the moonlight shining into the room.  
  
That was when she realized that the darkness and the voice came from within herself – and that there was nothing she would ever be able to do against it.

* * *

 _But I'm already there  
_ _I'm already there  
_ _Wherever there is you  
_ _I will be there too_

 _  
_ Lucina awoke in the early morning hours, when the first rays of sun shone on her face and when the birds started to sing their song. She drowsily rubbed her eyes and sat up in her bed, her sight still a bit blurry. In the corner of her eyes she noticed a dark figure on her bed and when she turned her head to look at it, she gasped audibly.  
That was Auntie Robin!  
There she was, with her upper body lying on the bed and sleeping, just as she had so many times before when she had sung her to sleep during her many visits.  
  
Lucina grinned from ear to ear when she saw her, she was barely able to contain her excitement. If Robin was here, then that meant that her father and mother were back too! She wanted to get up and greet them, but knew that they were most likely asleep anyway. Her aunt Lissa had told her that they would be tired upon their return, because they had been fighting very hard for Ylisse’s peace. Lucina did not want to disturb them, but part of her ached to run into her mother’s embrace and to get picked up by her father and spun around, as he always did when he greeted her.  
  
Lucina inhaled deeply. She needed to calm down and be patient, just like a good princess. She closed her eyes and listened to the birds outside, felt the warm sunrays on her skin – but all these things only made her want to start the day even more now.  
She gave up and decided her parents would forgive her if she awoke them just this once in the early morning.  
  
Carefully, she climbed out of her bed, ever so slow, moving like a rogue so that she wouldn’t wake her sleeping guest. When her foot touched the ground she didn’t feel the carpet she expected. Instead it was another textile, colder, smoother. She backed away and landed her foot elsewhere and when she stood on the floor she took a closer look and saw the Falchion in its leather sheath.  
Her eyes opened wide when she recognized it. What was the sword doing here in her room? She looked back up to Robin and noticed only now that the woman looked battered. The coat Lucina used to hide underneath was dirty and worn-out, and even though Robin slept, Lucina could see the unhappiness and exhaustion in her expression.  
  
Lucina’s heart started to beat faster. There were not many reasons she could think of as to why her father’s closest friend and tactician would have his sword with her.  
  
The sun stood a little higher on the horizon now, its rays gently falling on the sleeping woman’s face. Robin contorted her face and blinked once, twice and finally woke up. Her eyes met Lucina’s and the child’s paled expression said it all already.  
  
“Oh, Lucina…” Robin’s expression fell when she began to speak. She sat up straight, considering for a moment to not look into the child’s eyes while delivering the news; even the thought of running away crossed her mind and she hated herself for actually feeling relief at the idea. She took the Falchion and properly knelt down in front of the princess. “I’m so sorry. I couldn’t protect them.” She said and offered the sword to her.  
  
Lucina’s expression was blank. With disbelief she stared at the sword in front of her. How often had she imagined herself wielding it and fighting off enemies, making her father proud? She had wanted to wield it properly so bad, but now that it was really hers she did not want it.  
“Where is father?” She asked, not budging an inch.  
  
“He is dead, Lucina.” Robin answered. There was no way to break the news gently, so she said it curtly. “And your mother as well.”  
  
Lucina’s body stiffened when she heard that. The words made her chest hurt and the sword raised in front of her seemed to suddenly mock her: you have me now, but in exchange for your daddy.  
She shook her head. “No.” She just said, her voice starting to crack.  
  
Robin understood her pain too well. She stood up and laid the sword on Lucina’s bed. She would pick it up on her own someday, but for now she needed time to mourn.  
“Goodbye, Lucina.” Robin just said, not wanting to prolong her departure any further. She turned around to leave and when her hand was on the handle, the ten-year-old called out to her with shaking voice:  
  
“W-what do you mean with goodbye? Where are you going?”  
  
How could Robin explain to her that this was all her fault? That there was an evil dragon lurking inside her body and mind who threatened to take control over her in any given moment? That he, and by extension Robin herself, were responsible for Lucina’s beloved parents’ deaths? That it was not safe anymore to be near her? That Robin planned to disappear for good so that she could save her remaining friends before they were forced to battle her?  
“On a journey.”  
The answer was that she couldn’t. She did not doubt that Lucina would have understood her. The girl was bright and had always been eager to learn from her whenever she had visited. The problem was not that she wouldn’t be able to understand it. It was Robin who could not face the truth.  
  
She heard steps and suddenly, Lucina stood next to her, examining her face with worried eyes.  
“What kind of journey? Where will you go?”  
  
_The happy hunting grounds_ was the most honest answer Robin could have given her.  
She looked into the child’s eyes, which still shimmered bright blue despite having experienced loss mere moments ago. Lucina looked at her with genuine concern and trembling lips. There was so much pain in her expression but – most surprisingly – also life. She had not given in to sadness yet. She still cared about what happened around her.  
“A long one.” Robin answered eventually and focused on the door handle again. Lucina was heartbroken, but Robin did not intend to smash the little child’s heart to smithereens by declaring her own death.  
  
Lucina grabbed Robin’s coat, unwilling to let the woman leave the room.  
“Why? And when will you return?”  
  
There was something in Robin’s eyes that didn’t sit right with the ten-year-old. Why would she leave on a journey after her best friend just died? Why leave the people she called home? And why did she look so infinitely sad when she said she would go on a journey? She had looked differently when she had left with her father for the last time. Smiled even. Patted her head and told her they’d be back soon. Her auntie had always been a dutiful one, putting the lives of her friends always first – so had her father told her. That Robin was smart and that it was thanks to Robin that everyone had survived the Ylisse-Plegia war unscathed, just before she was born.  
  
“I don’t know.” Robin said, but her eyes gave her away. She knew. And something told Lucina that Robin would never come back if she left. First her parents and now Robin – she did not want that to happen.  
  
“I will come with you!” Lucina announced.  
  
“Don’t be silly. What about Lissa? Cynthia? Owain? Do you want to leave them all behind?” Robin did not look at the ten-year-old.  
  
Lucina frowned. “N-no…”  
  
“Then stay here in the castle where you are safe.” Robin pushed the handle down, ready to leave, but Lucina still had a hold of her coat.  
  
“What about you? Will you be safe out there?”  
  
The question made Robin snort. Was she safe if she was the danger at the same time?  
“Yes.” She lied and freed herself from the child’s grasp. She closed the door behind her and made her way out of the castle. Robin hated to leave like that, but there was not much she could do anyway. Seek forgiveness by the very people she betrayed? It was ridiculous. Robin was not sure if she could even forgive herself. No, it was best she disappeared as soon as possible. Leave all ends loose. It was worth if it meant her other friends would soon be safe.

 

~~~

 

Someone was following her. Robin heard footsteps whenever she passed by some bushes. They would stop when she’d stop to listen closer, to see whether it was an animal or a human, and continue when she’d continue her way too.  
She let this go on for a short while, before she stopped for good.  
“Come out. I know you’ve been following me.” She announced.  
  
The rustling of the bushes and leaves stopped. And then, after a few moments of consideration, a certain ten-year-old stepped out of the greenery in front of her way.  
Robin should have known. Lissa had never been subtle either when she had followed her around camp, waiting for the right moment to prank her. Discretion did not run in the Exalted blood it seemed.  
“Go back.” Robin ordered.  
  
“No! I will come with you.” Lucina insisted. She was fully dressed with the Falchion strapped over her shoulder.  
  
“No, it’s too dangerous for you!”  
  
“You told me it wouldn’t be!”  
  
“I’m not in danger because I can take care of myself!” Robin explained firmly and stepped by the girl. “Go back, Lucina. Go and care about your family.” This girl really was Chrom’s daughter. Foolish and stubborn, just like him. Robin walked away with relentless steps. Why couldn’t Lucina just let her go in peace? It would save them both from so much pain.  
  
“You are also my family!” Lucina shouted from behind, her voice uncharacteristically high-pitched.  
  
Robin stopped. “I’m not. Lissa is. Cynthia and Owain are.” She answered quietly. “Not me.” She added with a whisper.  
  
“Father always said that it is the bond that counts and not the blood!” The girl continued and soon thereafter, Robin could hear her sob.  
  
“I will follow you until you give up.” Lucina said meekly and straightened her posture. She put on a brave face and with her father’s sword on her back she actually felt courageous in that moment. She would not lose another beloved family member. Just like Robin said: Lissa, Cynthia and Owain would be fine back at the castle. It was heavily guarded after all, with soldiers everywhere. But her auntie was not safe. And wherever she wanted to go, Lucina was sure that this was not a journey to be made alone. She inhaled deeply as she wiped the tears away.  
“Wherever there is you, I will be there too!” She announced shakily.  
  
Robin could hear the change of heart in Lucina’s voice. She turned around and saw her: this lanky ten year old girl with her height only reaching Robin to the chest, bearing a sword that was too big for her and with a pair of bright blue eyes brimming with tears and yet, they radiated an oh so delicate childish determination. She looked serious and concerned at the same time, frightened and determined – simultaneously an adult and a child. Robin wanted to laugh and cry at the sight.  
“Look at you: all strong and determined – just like your father. You two won’t leave me alone, no matter what I do, right?” She smiled defeated.  
  
“Uh-huh!” Lucina smiled and Robin could see that she was missing one of her milk teeth: the lower left canine.  
She was just a baby, still losing the last of her primary teeth. And yet, she was so determined to follow her to the end of the world. Why? Just why couldn’t she just let her die in peace?  
  
Robin wiped a tear away as she walked towards the girl.  
“Fine, you won. Do whatever you want.”  
Was this the beginning of her punishment or salvation? Maybe it was both. Surely, she would someday regret letting Lucina tag along.  
  
But for now a selfish little part of her was happy that there was one person in the world who had not forsaken her.

* * *

_  
There's nothing that I'd take back  
But it's hard to say there's nothing I regret  
Cause when I sing, you shout  
I breath out loud  
You bleed, we crawl like animals_

 

Lucina stands tall, her blue eyes stoic as she slowly raises Falchion in front of her, ready to strike at any given moment. Smoke and dust rise behind her, a recollection of the fight she has led against Grima so far. A fight that has left her hometown in shambles.  
_That kid sure has grown,_ Grima thinks when he looks straight into her piercing blue eyes; an uncharacteristic fondness lingers within this thought. Of course, he thinks, after all that silly woman still loves her as if she were her own child.  
Grima opens his arms, the very arms that had held little Lucina close whenever she had not been able to fall asleep during the nights. He is smiling, knowing that Robin’s mocking expression pains Lucina more than the wounds he has inflicted on her.  
  
“Are you certain that you will be able to kill this body?” He asks, amber eyes brimming with conceit and confidence.  
  
Lucina’s grip around Falchion’s hilt tightens. “You will pay for the deaths of my friends and their families. Their sacrifices won’t be in vain.” She replies.  
  
“Ah, but you see, I didn’t kill _all_ of them…” Grima says and glances over at Lucina’s cousin Owain, barely clinging onto life with his last bits of strength. “Yet.”  
  
Quietly, Lucina raises her sword a little more. There is hate in her gaze, hate for the monster standing in front of her, who dared taking her beloved auntie’s body. But her arms tremble and the corners of her mouth twitch.  
  
“Lucina.” It is Robin that speaks now.  
That foolish woman, desperately trying to reach out to the little girl she spent raising the past years. Kill me, she wants to say, kill me because I am a monster. Grima does not let her talk further. The tender voice and desperate expression are gone within the next moment.  
  
It is enough to break Lucina’s stoic expression.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~

Robin continued her way for many hours without much breaks, despite having the company of a ten-year-old with her now.  
Lucina followed her quietly, usually oh so talkative, she had barely talked, only occasionally asked about their whereabouts and where Robin planned to spend the night.  
  
Robin answers were brief: East of Southtown and we will see.  
  
She was still torn about her decision to take Chrom’s daughter with her. What should she do now? She had planned on killing herself, to save the world from the danger inside her, but with Lucina so desperately clinging onto her Robin’s resolve had weakened. Maybe she should try and send her back again? Where would she go with the child anyway? She had not planned any of this.  
Then again, how strong had her resolve, to commit suicide, been in the first place, if it was so easily torn down by a little girl?  
  
A hand found its way into hers. Startled, Robin raised her gaze to watch the child walking next to her.  
  
Lucina’s gaze was fixed on the road, her head lowered and her eyes mostly covered by her bangs, leaving the woman unable to read her expression. While she did not say anything, the strong and trembling grip around Robin’s hand said more than enough.  
  
She squeezed Lucina’s hand a little before looking out into the horizon. “It should be around here.”  
  
Lucina gave her a quizzical look, but decided to remain silent still.  
  
When the sun set on the horizon, gently covering the earth and the sky around them in an orange light, they found themselves in front of an abandoned building made out of stone.  
“What is this place?” Lucina asked and curiously wandered inside.  
  
“An old guard post. During wars people were assigned to stay here and give word should they see enemies pass this region.” Robin explained.  
  
Curiously, Lucina walked around, but she found nothing except old beds, a study and cold hard stones. She contorted her face, when she noticed the cold wind blowing through holes made up by missing or broken off stones.  
“Do we have to stay here?”  
  
“This place has certainly seen better days.” Robin agreed. “But no one will forbid us to stay here.”  
  
Lucina remained silent.  
  
That night, Robin laid awake in one of the old beds, watching the moonlight shine into the room through broken window glasses. She shouldn’t have done this. She should have remained resolute and sent Lucina back to the castle. She had killed her parents for gods’ sake! Who knew what she would do next? Lucina was not safe with her.  
  
She could feel the mocking laugh in the back of her mind and felt cold sweat forming on her forehead. He was there. Always waiting, always lingering. How long until she would go crazy?  
  
“Robin?”  
  
Lucina’s meek voice jerked her out of her thoughts. With a fast beating heart she turned her head to see Lucina stand in front of her bed.  
“Lucina, why aren’t you asleep? It’s so late already.”  
  
“I…” Lucina lowered her blue eyes, hesitating for a moment. “I’m cold…” She answered and as if to emphasize her words the wind howled just a little louder inside the abandoned stone walls.  
  
Robin’s expression softened. “It is chilly.” She agreed and made some space in her bed. “Hop in.”  
  
Lucina smiled with relief and settled quickly right next to her.  
  
Robin watched her silently, waiting for the girl to fall asleep before she could return to her gloomy thoughts again. But Lucina did not fall asleep. Her blue eyes were wide open as she gazed at the single beam of moonlight, her face in deep thoughts. Robin wasn’t sure if she looked sad or melancholic.  
  
After a while, Lucina turned to her so that their gazes met. Two pairs of eyes silently examined each other, sadness faced guilt, blue against amber.  
“I miss mother and father.” Lucina finally said, her voice a mere whisper as if she was not allowed to express those thoughts.  
  
Robin was surprised to hear those words after Lucina had spoken with so much conviction about accompanying her. Yet, she should have expected them. Lucina had gotten the news of their deaths this very morning and soon thereafter had decided to leave the castle she had lived within, abandoning everyone she knew and leaving every source of comfort she had ever possessed behind.  
  
It was no surprise then, Robin realized, that the exhaustion of wandering through the lands for so many hours was not enough to let her fall into sleep.  
She should comfort the child, her arm twitched in an attempt to put it around the little girl’s body, but she hesitated. Wasn’t she after all the sole reason for Lucina’s misfortune? Wasn’t it hypocrisy to take her into her arms and whisper sweet lies into her ear? That everything would be alright, even though she knew it would never be?  
  
Her thoughts were interrupted yet again, when Lucina came closer and put her arms around Robin. “Auntie, can you sing me a song?” She whispered, face hidden in the woman’s torso.  
  
Robin smiled defeated. “How about your favorite?” She asked and, knowing the answer, she pulled Lucina up and close to her face.  
  
The girl nodded and settled her head right onto Robin’s chest, as she had done many times before when her auntie had sung her to sleep.  
Robin put one arm around Lucina’s back while the other was free to stroke the girl’s soft blue hair. She took a little breath, before she began to quietly sing next to Lucina’s ears.  
  
“Hush now,  
My darling,  
Close your eyes and sleep  
Waltzing the waves  
Diving in the deep…”  
  
The wind howled louder as she sung, but Robin did not raise her voice, knowing that her mouth was close enough to deliver the words without distortion to the child. Lucina had closed her eyes already, listening calmly to the song. She shook a bit whenever the wind grew stronger, her small hand holding tight onto Robin’s shirt.  
  
“Stars are shining bright  
The wind is on the rise  
Whispering words  
Of long lost lullabies.”  
  
Robin had sung this song to her almost every night when she had started to put her to sleep during her visits. Because at some point, little Lucina had decided that she couldn’t fall asleep alone when her daddy’s best friend was over, the reason for that being that the day had always been so much fun that she had not wanted it to end just like that. So Robin had started sitting by her bedside, listening to Lucina’s recollections of the most fun activities of the day and when she noticed the girl getting tired, she would slowly begin to sing when Lucina paused her account and pet her hair until she herself had fallen asleep on the bed right with the child.  
  
“Oh won't you come with me  
Where the moon is made of gold  
And in the morning sun  
We'll be sailing…”  
  
Robin, too, had never wanted those days to end, that’s why she had constantly allowed herself to fall asleep with Lucina. Chrom had always found this endearing and she would awake with him putting a hand on her shoulder saying “there are better places to take a nap than on Lucina’s bed” with a tender smile, well knowing that those words were reminiscent of their very first meeting. The memory made her smile and at the same time tears formed in her eyes.  
Her voice broke a little, but Lucina either did not notice or did not care. If this was her only source of comfort Robin would be damned if she didn’t press on and finish the song so that she could give the child at least a little bit of peace on this godforsaken day.  
  
“Oh won't you come with me  
Where the ocean meets the sky  
And as the clouds roll by  
We'll sing the song of the sea.”  
  
Robin covered Lucina with her tactician’s coat to offer some additional warmth on this cold night and pressed her closer. The girl had fallen asleep already and Robin closed her eyes and pretended that they were back in the castle and, that if morning came, she would awaken to the amused and loving gaze of her best friend.  
At some point sobs substituted the last words of the song and lasted until the first rays of sunshine began to illuminate the land.  
 

 ~~~~~~~  


Human emotions are a fickle thing. One word and a meaningful gaze already stopped the princess from unleashing her wrath onto him? How foolish; how utterly _weak_.  
“Do you regret now coming with me that day?” Grima asks. Where is the fun if his opponent doesn’t struggle for her dear life? Doesn’t get angry and just lets herself get killed?  
  
“I did not go with _you_.”  
  
“Of course not.” Grima’s mouth twitches while he tries to suppress a smile. “You went with _dear_ Aunt Robin.”  
  
“And I regret nothing.” Her gaze turns harsh again.  
  
“Ah, not even putting that much trust in your parents’ murderer?”  
  
“Silence, you serpent! It was you who killed them!”  
  
Grima chuckles. “She and I are but the same.” He says and extends his arms, mockingly imitating the invitation of an embrace. “And now hush, my darling.” He says with her mouth, the words slightly forming a melody.  
  
Lucina immediately recognizes the familiar tune.  
  
“Close your eyes and sleep.” Grima continues and with each word, horror grows on Lucina’s face whilst his lips form a horrid smile. He slowly steps closer. “Waltzing the waves…”  
  
“Shut up!” She screams, but he continues without any interruptions: “Diving in the deep...” How must it feel like to hear such a familiar tune, out of the same mouth that always sang it, knowing, however, that those aren’t her aunt’s words?  
How does it feel to listen to a voice that is so painfully Robin’s and yet see Grima’s mocking expression in her very eyes? The despair and pain in Lucina’s face give him a very good idea on how painful this must be. Again, she shouts, almost screeches, for him to stop, but my, he has so much fun right now. So why would he?  
At some point, she dashes forward.  
He is curious, would she finally dare harm that body? She pierces her sword between his vessel’s ribs with one fast and well calculated thrust. There are tears streaming down her face. “Shut up! _Shut up!_ ” She pleads, holding the sword still, unable to further slash into the body of the person who raised her after her parents’ death – and Grima smiles as he wipes the blood away that starts dripping from his mouth.  
  
That’s more like it. Grima’s hand is swift and effortlessly manages to slash Lucina’s side. She has good reflexes; had she not held onto her cursed father’s sword while trying to avoid his hit, she would have remained unscathed.  
She pulls the sword out of his body now that he stopped his mockery of a song.  
  
He shakes his head. “Grave mistake.” The next time he hits, he hits her hard. The blow sends her flying back and lands her right next to her red-haired friend‘s corpse. His own wound bleeds and with a frown he watches the blood drip onto the ground. ”That accursed sword.” It is the only thing that can actually hurt, nay, defeat him. The sword and that girl who is the only remaining descendant worthy of wielding it.  
He should have killed her long ago, but of course that woman would not let him.  
  
Lucina tries to get up. Panting she lifts herself up on all fours now. Like a feral beast her gaze is wild now, determined. One hand reaches for the sword and grabs it firmly again.  
With a shout, she dashes towards Grima again, her posture bent, her steps unsteady from the damage received.  
  
Grima exhales as he prepares to launch at her, just like one of those wretched animals he so despises.

* * *

 

 _But when it's over, I'm still awake  
A thousand silhouettes  
Dancing on my chest  
No matter where I sleep  
You are haunting me  
  
_ “Auntie, what are you making?” Curiously Lucina squatted next to the campfire and peeked inside the tin pot.  
  
“We got some meat from the villagers we helped out today, I thought it’d be nice to eat it fresh for a change.” Robin explained as she stirred the soup.  
  
Lucina frowned and sniffed curiously the air. “What kind of soup is this?”  
  
“Just a plain soup with dill, rice and meat.”  
  
The child visibly winced. “Yuck.”  
  
Robin could only laugh. It was rare to see Lucina behave like the typical girly princess. They had been living as vagabonds for a few months now, always staying in abandoned fortresses and cabins or camping outside if they were unlucky – never once had Lucina complained about not being comfortable or hating the food. She had always been eager to help Ylissean’s in need, much like her father and aunt Emmeryn and without expecting anything in return.  
_What a waste for her to grow up like that_ … Robin thought and wondered if the people missed their little princess. But she did not let Lucina on onto those thoughts, instead she smiled and said: “I added a few other things too, it’s not as bad as it sounds, I promise.”  
  
The girl did not seem convinced. “If you say so…”  
  
How was Lissa coping? Did she even know where Lucina was or did she worry? With no one else left, she’d have to fulfill the duties of the Exalt now. The third-born child of the royal family, what a tragedy for her to take on duties she had not been expected to fulfill. Should they return to Ylisstol to see how things were going? Maybe that would prompt Lucina to stay at home too…  
“Here, try it.” Robin said and poured some of the soup into a bowl and handed it over to the girl.  
  
Lucina wrinkled her nose and stirred slowly her food. “Auntie?”  
  
“Yes?” Robin replied as she poured herself some soup too.  
  
“I didn’t know you were so good in sword fighting.”  
  
Out of all the things Robin expected Lucina to say, a comment about her use of the sword was none of them. “I’m not as good as your father.” She must have been surprised after seeing how Robin had fought some bandits off today.  
  
Lucina did not comment on her answer. She blew on her food and ate the first spoonful. She rose her eyebrows, surprised that it was more than edible. She looked between her bowl and aunt and ate some more, before she continued the conversation: “Can you teach me?”  
  
Robin’s gaze wandered thoughtfully to the Falchion sticking out behind the girl’s shoulder, she too, ate a spoonful before she answered. “Sure.” No matter whether Lucina returned home or would continue accompanying her, it would be best if she learned how to fend for herself. She had taken lessons before, eager to start at a very young age because of all the heroic stories she had heard of her father and seeing him wield the Falchion proudly. Did she ask for lessons to keep his memory alive? Who knew.  
  
“Auntie?”  
  
“Yes?”  
  
“Can you teach me magic and tactics too? Just like before?”  
  
Robin frowned. “I can, but… why are you suddenly so interested in continuing your studies?”  
  
Lucina only gave her a shrug and returned her attention to her food.  
  
“Lucina.” Robin called her, her voice more serious now.  
  
The girl pretended to not have heard anything.  
  
“Lucina, do you miss home and your old life?” The woman asked. ”Is that why you want to learn the way of the sword or tactics, just like your father and I taught you before we went into battle?”  
  
Lucina did not raise her gaze and meekly continued to eat one spoon of soup after another.  
  
Robin did not blame her. Too many emotions had been at play when Lucina had decided to come along and not let her go alone. She was just a child after all.  
Even though Robin felt herself becoming increasingly disappointed with the realization, she knew this was for the best. What had she intended to do with Lucina anyway? Play the kind-hearted travelers for the rest of their lives? If she had truly believed that, than she had been more of a fool than she thought.  
  
“I want to protect you.” Lucina’s voice suddenly said, still half a murmur.  
  
Robin thought she had misheard. “Protect me?” She repeated confused.  
  
Lucina nodded.  
  
Why did her heart start to beat faster? Robin was nervous, but for what reason? She gazed expectantly at the ten-year-old, pearls of sweat slowly forming on her forehead. Her hand had stopped mid-air with a dripping full spoon.  
  
“Something is chasing you… Sometimes you whisper in your sleep at night.” Lucina’s voice was a mere whisper. “And I heard the villagers talk; the war is not over yet. They speak of a mad king and a strange army.”  
  
Images flashed in front of her mind’s eye: her fighting off Ylissean troops, undead soldiers at her side – blood is scattered everywhere as she laughs over humankind’s pain.  
Dreams that had felt too real and left behind memories of a life that would hopefully never be.  
  
Robin had heard of the rumors Lucina spoke of, but she and Chrom had defeated Validar with their own hands – was he still alive and they had been mistaken? Who else could this mad king be the people talked about? It hadn’t made any sense. That’s why she had chosen to ignore it.  
“It is nothing, just some nightmares. Don’t worry about me.” She assured the girl. “And rumors are just that: rumors. You should ignore them.”   
  
Lucina said nothing, instead gazed thoughtfully at her food for a long while before she continued.  
  
Robin’s nightmares became worse after that. As if Lucina’s words had torn open a seal she hadn’t even known existed within her.

~

Auntie Robin kept her word and started teaching her in swordsmanship and tactics. The Falchion was bigger and heavier than the sword she used to train with and so she started with the basic stances and grips before she could move on to actual combat practice.  
  
Moving in synch with her as they swung their swords and practiced together every morning reminded Lucina very much of the days she had spent with her father. Even though she still missed him and her mother, her aunt Lissa and her sister Cynthia and cousin Owain… Training gave her a purpose and distraction. It made her feel strong, even though she wasn’t as strong as her father yet. But she knew, someday she would be. She had to.  
She did not know why, but something was driving her.  
  
Studying tactics on the road was not as easy.  
Robin did not have the same amount of books with her as she had possessed back in the castle and Lucina resorted to reading them only in the evenings, whenever she felt fit enough to stay awake for a little longer.  
When she had read them all they’d make more frequent stops at libraries and bookstores in the bigger towns, Robin would make sketches of battlefields and units and quiz Lucina on how she’d command her troops in the given situations. Sometimes she’d brood over her answer for days. Sometimes it would have been all for naught, because Robin would dismantle her way of thinking after she would just begin lining out her strategy – at other times she’d impress her auntie with her unusual and quick witted ideas and make her proud. Robin would smile then and pat her head.  
Lucina would smile back and feel especially happy, because those were the only times Robin would smile without shadows behind her eyes.  
  
Lucina would miss her family the most during the lonely nights were she’d go to bed after Robin, because she would want to study a little bit more. Robin would not sing her to sleep then and not talk with her until she felt tired enough to do so. Robin would just fall into her bed and drift off to sleep quickly and while she did look calm, she also looked very, very sad. Lucina could not bear to watch her for more than a few moments. She’d focus on her book or the problem Robin asked her to solve.  
  
Sometimes Robin would talk in her sleep. No, _often_ she would talk in her sleep. It seemed to Lucina that this happened even more frequently after she had told Robin about it. Robin would speak of death and destruction, give commands to invisible soldiers… but the scariest part was that she’d mock Ylissean soldiers. She would laugh at them and at what Lucina could only imagine be their pain.  
  
Trying to wake her wouldn’t help.  
  
“Auntie…?” Carefully, Lucina placed a hand on Robin’s shoulder. The woman frowned and moved in her sleep, but remained in the same position.  
  
Lucina pulled her hand back. She was not sure what she had expected.  
  
Suddenly, Robin opened her eyes and something felt very, very wrong. The kindness was gone. Only hatred adorned her face.  
“You should let the dragon do his bidding.” She said in a voice that sounded off.  
  
It scared Lucina and she made a step back.  
  
Strange markings appeared on Robin’s face, familiar ones that looked much like the eyes on her coat.  
What were those? Lucina paled.  
  
When the additional eyes opened she gasped and suddenly she found herself on her bed.  
  
“Lucina, are you alright? You were screaming.” Robin was by her bedside, her eyes looking worried and kind as ever.  
  
Lucina stared at her, at the amber color and the hidden sadness in her eyes and wondered if it was worth worrying about that all too realistic dream.  
  
Before she knew it, several years had gone by.  
  
When Lucina turned eleven, she noticed for the first time how Robin had stolen away from their current hideout in the middle of the night.  
At the same time the people would start talking about a new kind of monster that resembled walking corpses.  
When she asked Robin about her whereabouts the next morning, she would genuinely not remember a thing.  
  
After she turned twelve they would encounter the Risen for the first time. Lucina had been scared stiff, too afraid to fight, let alone raise her sword. Robin saved them both with her magic and got hurt pretty bad to the side.  
After that incident Lucina vowed to train even harder.  
Robin’s wound disappeared the very next day.  
  
By the time she was fourteen Robin would steal away every month. Sometimes even for one or two full days and nights. Lucina would pretend to not notice because she was still scared of seeing those markings on her aunt and the hateful gaze that had not been her own. She was certain now that what she had seen had not been a mere dream. She’d use the time to study, train and help nearby villagers out.  
  
At fifteen Lucina would beat every young man who dared challenging her to a swordfight upon seeing Falchion.  
  
“Bested by a girl, I can’t believe it!” They heard the young man shouting from afar as he made his way home. His best friend only laughed as they disappeared down the road.  
  
Robin could not hide the proud smile.  
Lucina was almost a woman now. Smart, strong and surely not the lanky girl she had been when she had strapped Falchion to her back and decided to follow Robin out into the unknown. She had developed her fair share of muscles and her eyes shone brightly with kindness and cleverness. She was as tall as Robin now and Robin was sure that it would not stay that way.  
“You should have gone easy on him.” She said with an amused expression.  
  
Lucina sheathed her sword and turned to her with an equally amused smile. “He wanted to go out with me if he wins, how could I go easy on him?”  
  
“Did you want to prove that you aren’t inferior to him because you are a girl or did you just not like him?”  
  
Lucina only laughed.  
  
Robin placed a hand on her shoulder. “You sure have grown.” She said with fondness in her eyes.  
  
The teenager placed a hand on Robin’s. “It’s all thanks to you.”  
  
Robin’s smile grew humbler now. How would have Chrom reacted if he had seen his first-born daughter like that? Skilled with the sword and sharp with the mind? Certainly, he would have been proud. Her heart ached, knowing that he never had the opportunity to see her grow up.  
“Let’s go eat something.” She suggested.  
  
Lucina nodded.  
  
By word of mouth they knew that Lissa had become Ylisse’s new Exalt five years ago. War with Plegia had grown worse over the years. Whenever Ylissean soldiers managed to keep the enemies at the border, something would happen and decimate the numbers. Rumors had started to spread, about a secret weapon or an entirely new kind of threat.  
Robin felt guilty whenever she heard those kind of news. She should have been with Lissa at Ylisstol castle and help her win this war. Who was helping her now? Did she have a skilled tactician by her side? A trusted advisor? Thank goodness Ferox stood by Ylisse’s side and helped her out.  
Robin’s nightmares had grown worse and frequent – but if this was the only thing wrong with her, then she would able to return and help Lissa out. Maybe she was strong enough to hold the dragon at bay after all.  
  
Another night at another old fortress.  
Robin laid on her bed and stared mindlessly into a dark corner, while Lucina slept soundly in the bed next to hers. The more she focused on it, the darker the spot would grow. She learned that this was nothing unusual – as long as the shadows did not start to dance. Lately, she felt very tired, as if she hadn’t gotten any proper sleep at all. Her eyes drowsily dropped close.

 _She dreams that she flies high above Ylisse’s forests and fields. If she tries to look at her body, she will see nothing. It is a familiar dream, one that she despises with all her heart. She will fly towards the west; the lush green grass grows thinner and transitions eventually into Plegian sand dunes.  
__Someone talks into her mind, tells her that she needs to find people to kill, to help win the war.  
__And she finds them.  
__She always finds the battle fields.  
  
__Sometimes she will tear Pegasus riders off the sky while she is about to land; dig her claws into the winged horses and take them with her to the ground where she will continue her rampage. This time will be no different.  
__Who will her next victim be? Ah, the red-haired one makes for a nice target…  
__She approaches quickly. The Pegasus rider is busy avoiding arrows. She prepares to dig her claws into the animal and suddenly, the rider notices her and reddish-brown eyes meet amber ones.  
__She halts and horror shows on the rider’s face.  
__“You?!”  
  
__Robin falls out of her dream and suddenly her mind is clear.  
_ She does not wake up in her bed in the abandoned fortress.  
  
Robin blinked a few times before she realized where she was. “No… Please, no…” She whispered. She held her aching head as she looked around, but the desert sand around her told her all she needed to know. White-skinned Ylissean’s and Feroxi where fighting against large amounts of undead soldiers, the Risen. She could hear steel swords clashing against each other, screams of wounded humans and the outcries of the undead as they mindlessly charged into whoever stood nearby. The battle field reeked of blood and sweat and death.  
“Those dreams…!” An attacked stopped her from thinking any further.  
  
“You traitor!” A familiar voice shouted from behind her and Robin didn’t know how she had had the foresight to avoid the incoming lance from behind.  
  
“Cordelia??” She shouted surprised as she turned around to face her opponent.  
  
“How dare you take the Plegian’s side!” Cordelia’s expression was hard. Nothing like the kind woman Robin used to know. Her words hurt.  
  
“I am not!” Was the only thing Robin managed to bring out.  
  
“Don’t lie to me! There have been rumors going around for years that a person in a Plegian tactician’s coat appears from time to time in battle and wages war on the Ylisseans!” Cordelia’s grip around her lance tightened. “When Stahl told me he saw you I couldn’t believe it.”  
  
“Stahl?” The kind-hearted cavalier in the viridian green armor had been in her dreams too. Quite a few times actually. Until she dreamt of killing him; she never saw him again after that. Robin gulped. _No, this can’t be…!  
_ “What happened to him?”  
  
“He is dead.” Cordelia said curtly.  
  
Robin’s hand twitched. _You have to kill her._ Was that really her own thought? Something felt off. No way – she would not kill her old friend! Her head started to ache again.  
  
“I can’t believe that it was really you.” The Pegasus knight continued and her voice started to shake. “After all these years…” She, too, was torn by this turn of events. “Why did you betray us??”  
  
“I did not!” How could she explain those dreams to Cordelia? That she had never known that any of this had been true?  
  
“You did! And you took Lucina right with you, too!”  
  
“I…!” It was undeniable: Cordelia was furious. Was there really no way of explaining the situation with mere words? “She came voluntarily!”  
  
“And why would you let her tag along? She was ten for gods’ sake! Don’t lie to me! You would have never done such an unreasonable thing!”  
  
Panic rose inside Robin. “Cordelia, listen, _please_ …!” There were tears in her eyes now. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen!”  
_– Kill her, that way no one in Ylisstol will know your whereabouts.  
__No!  
_ Robin felt how her consciousness slowly fell into darkness. She was about to faint, but what would happen afterwards?  
  
“Tell me, Robin: is she at least alive?” Cordelia inhaled deeply and straightened her posture. Her Pegasus pawed the ground, ready to take into the skies for the next attack.  
  
Robin’s hand twitched again. Slowly, she came closer. Cordelia was still on her guard, but Robin could see the hesitation in her eyes. She was an old friend after all and Cordelia had too kind of a heart to fully mistrust her, even after all these years of absence.  
  
“Lucina is…” Robin raised her gaze to meet Cordelia’s and as soon as she saw Robin’s crazed expression, Cordelia gave her Pegasus the order to take off to the sky. “ _…none of your business_!” Robin shouted and conjured a thunder spell.  
  
Wait, what was she doing? She shouldn’t attack Cordelia like that!  
“No, what am I doing…?”  
The Pegasus had been faster than her and avoided the spell by dodging sideways with a strong flap of its wings.  
  
“Tell me where she is or I will tell Lissa of your betrayal and we will scour all of the continent for her!” Cordelia shouted. She pressed her heels onto the winged horse, a gesture at which the creature immediately descended to approach the enemy again.  
  
What would poor Lissa think if she knew the two of them were fighting? Or Lucina? This was her friend’s mother after all.  
A stab in her shoulder tore her painfully out of her thoughts.  
_She is willing to kill you too.  
  
_ “Did you kill her? Answer me!” Cordelia demanded and pulled her lance out.  
  
Blood gushed out of her wound and despair found its way into Robin’s heart. “I would never…! Do you really think that this is who I am?!” She shrieked with tears in her eyes.  
– _Isn’t she right though? What’s the difference between killing your friends on the battlefield or a child?  
__This is_ not _who I am!  
  
_ “I don’t know anything anymore!” Cordelia’s hardened expression broke bit by bit. She contorted her face, trying to keep her composure. “Ylisse needs its princess and you had no right to steal her away!”  
  
“I know!” What else should she say? Cordelia was right. What in the world had she been thinking? She had allowed Lucina to come with her for her own selfish reasons, because she had not really wanted to kill herself – because the child had believed in her.  
Wasn’t it pathetic? To use a child’s innocent love and faith as an excuse to keep evil in the world? And there she had believed Lucina might have been able to lead her the way to salvation.  
  
“Please, return her to her family.” Cordelia begged and her expression was one of a worried mother. Right, she had born a child several years ago. Wouldn’t it be a pity if she were never able to return to poor little Severa?  
  
“Cordelia…” Robin said and approached slowly. She was tired. Her vision darkened and her head hurt so much, she felt it was about to burst.  
  
Cordelia saw the exhaustion in Robin’s eyes and knew that she had struggled as much as them in these past five years. ”Robin…” She said softly. This couldn’t possibly be the face of a traitor.  
  
Robin noticed with relief the hesitation in Cordelia’s demeanor. Maybe they would be able to talk everything over after all… She came closer, blinked and then halted horrified. The darkness in her vision had started to dance around, tiny little silhouettes mocking the situation in front of her.  
  
The next thing she remembered was Cordelia’s blood dripping from her sword onto her hand and the pained expression of sorrow, regret and pity behind brown and red eyes. Robin had stabbed her with a foreign force so strong that the sword had pierced right through her old friend’s armor and into her heart.  
  
This time Robin knew exactly that she wouldn’t wake up and find herself in her bed again. So she walked and walked and walked, through deserts and fields and forests until she finally reached the fortress she had left several nights ago. When she arrived in the middle of the night, she noticed with relief that Lucina was still there, sleeping all folded up in her bed as usual. Falchion stood on the wall right next to her head and when Robin saw the sword she frowned.  
  
_The child needs to go.  
  
_ Robin shook her head to get rid of the tempting whispers. She would never kill Lucina. She went up to the girl, tempted to fall asleep right next to her on the bed, as they had done several times ever since they had left Ylisstol for good. The girl had a calming air around her, Robin wondered if this came from her heritage and the connection with the holy dragon goddess.  
“Please, protect your auntie… I don’t think I can do this anymore…” She whispered and laid down next to her, eyes wide open, staring into the dark room.  
_You never could. This was inevitable.  
  
_ Lucina must have felt her presence, because she immediately stirred in her sleep and moved closer, so that her back touched Robin’s torso. The whisper that told her to kill died down. She hated to embrace the little princess with the arms of a murderer, but she told herself it was only for one night. For one night and for the sake of her own sanity.  
  
The dancing silhouettes never left her vision again and the voice of the dragon would grow strong and clear. Even with Lucina close the darkness would continue to haunt her.  
She was not safe with her anymore.  
  
Robin needed to tell Lucina the truth that was long overdue.

* * *

   
_But I'm already there  
I'm already there  
Wherever there is you  
__I will be there too_

 

“War is on our doorstep.” Lucina said matter-of-factly as she laid Ylisse’s map onto the table. Her eleven childhood friends solemnly bended over the map where Lucina had marked the positions of the current enemy troops. “We are surrounded and the Risen will keep coming unless we kill their source.”  
  
“Their source?” Her sister Cynthia asked with an unsure frown.  
  
“The Fell Dragon Grima.” Lucina replied, her eyes still on the map. “They plan on surrounding Ylisstol. Ferox has fallen and our army at the Plegian border is forced to retreat inland to minimize their losses.”  
  
“So it’s only a matter of time then.” Severa commented bitterly and crossed her arms.  
  
“Is that it? C-can we only wait for our death?” Yarne asked and his eyes were full of sorrow.  
  
Lucina shook her head. “There is a way to defeat him.” She looked up to meet the gazes of her friends: Kjelle, Laurent and Gerome were looking at her expectantly, awaiting a solution that they knew was barely possible to achieve, others, like Yarne, Noire and Cynthia could only look at her with sorrow in their eyes, Inigo tried to smile at her, to offer her what little encouragement he had left to give, Nah, Severa and Brady tried to hide their doubts, tried to put on a tough expression, but Lucina knew better. Only her cousin Owain seemed to recall the old legends of their family and nodded in understanding.   
  
“We need the Fire Emblem and commence the Awakening.” The princess explained.  
  
“Are you serious??” Severa angrily slammed her hands onto the table. “How in the world are we gonna find the four jewels? They are scattered across the continents and we have only little time left!” Next to her, Noire winced at her loud voice.  
  
Lucina met her gaze, steady, but not being able to completely hide her own discomfort. She knew that she asked the impossible of her friends. However, they had no other choice. It was either wait for their defeat or try to stand up and achieve the impossible – and she was not willing to go down without a fight.  
She inhaled, needing a moment to collect her thoughts, before she started to explain what she had in mind: “We will split up. The eleven of you will retrieve the gems from Ferox, the Milla tree, Chon’sin and Plegia, respectively. I will stay here and command the troops and try to relocate the battles so that you will stay mostly out of war’s claws.”  
  
“You want to use the rest of your soldiers in feints, so that we will have a chance to infiltrate enemy land?” Laurent summarized as he looked at the map again.  
  
Lucina nodded with a heavy heart. She hated to talk so blatantly about putting the lives of her people on the line, to basically sacrifice them for a greater cause, but she saw no other way. This was not how Robin had taught her on warfare – no, she had always put the value in saving people’s lives and minimize their losses when concocting her strategies. But with her remaining resources and time there was nothing much Lucina could have done.  
  
“When shall we depart?” Gerome asked.  
  
“Tomorrow, with the rise of dawn. I want you all to get a good night’s rest before you leave.” She wanted to sigh, to drop the tough act, but if she, as their leader, showed signs of abandoning hope then they’d never push through to the end. She needed to be strong for everyone, because she was all they had left in this war-torn land. She went on to divide her friends into groups and to appoint a destination for each of them.  
  
When all was said and done, she dismissed them and stayed behind in the council room to collect her maps and books, before returning to her chambers.  
  
Five years had passed ever since she had parted from Robin and returned to her hometown Ylisstol. She had been distraught when she had arrived, because the Fell Dragon had revealed himself in Robin’s body shortly before and when she had finally returned to the castle she had known as home, ironically her timing could not have been any better, because Lissa had just passed on the battlefield: she had refused to let the last of the Shepherds fight without her, had taken their side as loyal friend and healer instead of the Exalt – and had paid the price.    
Just when everyone had thought they had lost their last hope, Lucina had reappeared and promptly taken over as heir of the throne.  
  
The long stone floors on her way to her chambers creeped her out. She had never really unlearned her fear of the dark during her travels, but why should she have? After all, Robin had always been by her side and taken her into her arms when she got too afraid. Ironically even after Robin herself had started to become another reason to fear it.  
  
Lucina had had strong suspicions about Robin’s whereabouts whenever she had disappeared during the nights. The sudden rise of the numbers in Risen, the reports of the Ylissean army losing battles… they had always aligned with her aunt stealing away. Lucina had taken notice of all that, especially after beginning her studies on tactics anew. It had been Robin who had taught her to keep up with the words of the street and the current situation – collecting information was an integral part of being a good tactician after all.  
  
Despite knowing all of this, Lucina had refused to align all the pieces of the puzzle.  
How in the world could she have believed that her aunt, the person who she had always looked up to and who had raised her for five years on the streets was a murderer? The person who had sung her to sleep ever since she could remember? The person who continued her father’s legacy and taught her how to properly fight? The person who would always tell her old stories of her parents whenever she had wanted to hear them, despite knowing that it hurt to reminiscence?  
She had not.  
Her trust in Robin had been far too great to ever be shaken – until the day Grima had talked directly to her.  
  
She was not sure how Grima had ever been able to take control of Robin’s body, but she knew that something had been off ever since the fateful day she had returned to Ylisstol and delivered her the news of her parents’ death. Robin had never really been the same afterwards.  
Was Grima able to access her mind and memories? If so, it would be impossible to win this war. Robin would see right through her simple plan. She knew though, that her friends would make it back – Grima liked playing games. He’d love to see how far she’d be able to come. Even if only to crush her to death right afterwards.  
  
The torches on the walls flickered and suddenly, she felt a cold stare on her back. Hastily, she turned around, goosebumps forming underneath her clothes.  
A hooded figure stood in the half-shadow and smirked menacingly at her:  
_“Wherever there is you, I will be there too.”_

 

* * *

 

 

 _But I'm already there_  
_I'm already there_  
_Wherever there is you_  
_I will be there too_

 

“Wherever there is you, I will be there too.” Robin said and smiled softly at the pond. “Do you remember how you said these words to me?”  
  
Lucina chuckled softly. “How could I not? They changed my whole life.” She answered, her gaze alternating between looking at the water and back to her companion.  
  
It was a warm summer evening. The two of them had been lucky enough to find a wooden cabin deep inside a forest that no one had entered or used in years. The beds, furniture and other utensils had been in good condition, only covered in dust as they had stood forgotten over a long time. Not only that, the cabin had been built near a pond with crystal clear water.  
How come no one comes here anymore? Lucina had asked and Robin could only muse that the owners had died in one of the battles with Plegia long ago.  
The place had looked like straight out of one of Lucina’s old fairy tale books: a small pretty cabin, surrounded by forest and greens and beautiful flowers standing by a body of clear and refreshing water. After coming to the conclusion that no one would drive them out of there anytime soon they decided to stay for as long as they could.  
  
Robin smiled gently at that. “I was really surprised by your conviction back then. I expected you to give up at some point, to say that you miss your home and your parents and Lissa and the others. But you did not. Not even once did you complain about anything.” The smile slowly disappeared from her face, turning her expression more neutral, more thoughtful.  
  
“Ah, well…” Sheepishly, Lucina’s hands searched for a small stone on the ground and as soon as she found one, she threw it into the water. “I don’t know why, but I couldn’t stand the thought of leaving you alone. You were as important to me as any of my blood-relatives and you had looked like you never wanted to come back. I couldn’t bear the thought.” A soft red hue appeared on her cheeks. “I admired you quite a lot as a child. Looking back, I think it may have been a little more than that.”  
  
Upon hearing Lucina’s words, Robin turned to her. Her lips curved once more into a lenient smile when she noticed Lucina’s embarrassment. “So that’s why you used to follow me around all the time in the castle?”  
  
Fireflies started to come out of hiding and in the fading sunlight they could see the insects hover and glow nearby.  
  
“Robin, you never really told me why we left Ylisstol in the first place.” Lucina suddenly said, as she threw another stone and watched the last ripples fade away. “It’s been six years now.” Of course, that had not only been Robin’s fault. Lucina had been too afraid to ask, in case Robin might have gotten angry with her and sent her back. But now Lucina was sixteen years old and she had learned to take care of herself. She did not need to be afraid of being sent back anymore. Decisions like that were hers to make now.  
  
Silence grew between them as Robin thought over her answer.  
Crickets began singing their evening song and Lucina noticed with a heavy heart that this evening could have been so much calmer and so much more beautiful if Robin did not have something to hide from her. Her posture had stiffened, the sudden change of topic had obviously caught her off guard.  
  
A long while passed in which the both of them opted to look silently at the fireflies.  
Finally, the older woman sighed deeply and leaned a bit back.  
“I never intended to return to Ylisstol, Lucina.” She said, her eyes always on the water. “I had wanted to leave on my own, so that I could kill myself.”  
  
The revelation left the teenager speechless. With disbelief she looked away from the pond and towards Robin. “But… but why?” She had known that something had been off, but that Robin had contemplated something of this size… Suddenly, the warmth of the sunrays she had felt mere moments ago was gone.  
“Lucina, I never really told you how your parents died, didn’t I?” Robin asked in response. Her expression had turned pensive.  
  
Lucina shook her head. “Only that they fell in battle.” She had not questioned it, because as tactician Robin had not always been able to fight by her father’s side and witness his battles. She looked curiously towards Robin who had still not found the confidence to look back at her.  
  
“I killed them.”  
  
That’s what Robin said and there was an aloofness in her eyes that Lucina had never seen before.  
And for some reason she had known. All the times Robin had stolen away at night and all the times she returned with a battered body and mind flashed before Lucina’s eyes.  
But still, what came out of her mouth was a simple, almost inaudible “no”. Despite what her unconscious already knew, her heart refused to believe it.  
“You would never…!”  
  
The aloofness in Robin’s gaze disappeared and made way for the gleam of upcoming tears. “I drove a thunder spell through Chrom’s heart, shot Sumia off her Pegasus and killed Frederick in physical combat.” She told her and with each word she seemed to grow smaller in size: shoulders slouched, her back bent forward and she withdrew her feet towards her body. “I’m so sorry, Lucina. I am so, _so_ sorry.” Her voice pleaded and hearing the crack in it made Lucina want to cry too. She had never seen her beloved auntie cry.  
  
“No, Robin, please… I’m sure you never meant for any of this to happen.” Lucina said, trying hard to not sound desperate. This could not possibly be true. She was torn, between wanting to hold her aunt’s hand and comfort her and fighting the upcoming sickness in her stomach and keeping away.  
  
“Of course I did not!” Robin shouted and her sudden loud voice made Lucina wince and draw back a little. “But this accursed body of mine was always meant to be a vessel for the Fell Dragon.” She explained and the tears started to fall. “I can’t escape him, Lucina. For so many years I thought I did. I kept killing in what I thought were mere dreams.” Finally, she looked up and her amber eyes locked with Lucina’s blue ones. The sixteen-year-old could barely hold her gaze. Endless suffering and desperation lay within them.  
“But they weren’t. I kept killing the people I loved. Each of the Shepherds died by my hands.”  
  
Lucina shook her head in dismay. “No…”  
  
“He has been with us all this time, Lucina. Go back. You are not safe with me anymore.” Robin pleaded. She made a short pause in which she straightened her posture again and this time, something in her expression was different. “You never were.” What was this unfamiliarity that had crept into Robin’s eyes? Lucina couldn’t read her face. It was neither sadness, nor guilt; she knew how those looked like on her aunt.  
  
“I won’t.” Lucina answered adamantly. “You’ve been protecting me all this time and now it is my turn to do the same.” She said and her one hand found Falchion’s hilt, to give her the courage she’d need for this task.  
  
Robin snorted and the smile that followed was devoid of any kindness. “Do you know that this exact attitude cost you the lives of thousands of people?” She asked and leaned in closer. “If you had just let auntie Robin go away on that fateful day, she would have killed herself and the vessel would have been no more…” She whispered into Lucina’s ear.  
Her breath was cold and uncomfortable; the girl shuddered. She had never had a problem before with being close to Robin – why then, did it feel so wrong this time?  
  
“But you couldn’t because you _loved_ her so much.” Robin continued, her tone a mockery of the once kind and soft voice. She placed a hand on Lucina’s cheek and drew back to look into her eyes.  
  
Even though she looked the same, Lucina could not help but feel that this was not the Robin she knew anymore. The look in her eyes, her demeanor, the tone of her voice… all so painfully familiar and yet, something was horribly off. Panic arose in her. She should have stood up and left, but Lucina found herself unable to do so.  
  
“It’s alright.” Robin cooed and stroked the girl’s cheek. “I love you too. Or else I’d have never gotten a chance at destroying this rotten world.” She whispered with a sardonic smile.  
  
By now, the sun had fully set and only the light of the fireflies illuminated her face in the dark. Robin could have looked so kind, so beautiful, but the hate in her eyes scared Lucina more than everything she had ever seen.  
  
And Robin knew. Oh, how Robin knew what an effect she had on her. Lucina could see it in the amusement of her smiling lips.  
Again, Robin drew closer. “Thank you.” She whispered and only now did Lucina notice that their surroundings lay in silence. Nothing could be heard anymore. It felt as if the world had shifted in just a mere moment and had placed her inside another world, a darker one, where even the insects were too afraid to speak up. Robin’s lips touched hers and when Lucina had processed what just happened she backed away, horrified.  
  
“There is no saving your auntie anymore.” Grima said and the strange markings started to appear on his face again.  
  
It took Lucina everything she had to stand up and run away.

* * *

  
_Cause I'm already there_  
_I'm already there_  
_Wherever there is you_  
_I will be there too_  
_I'm already there_  
_I'm already there_  
_Wherever there is you_  
_I will be there too_

 

The palace’s graveyard lies in silence as Lucina kneels in front of her beloved parents’ graves to pay her respects. She folds her hands to pray or talk with them, but cannot come up with any words. Her mind is empty. What is she supposed to feel after losing almost all her friends in the final battle against the Fell Dragon? After being forced to kill Robin?  
So many times did Owain try to tell her that it was Grima she killed, but Lucina can’t shake the guilt. Robin had still been inside that body, had tried to reach out to her… but of course, there had been no other solution. The two of them had been inextricably linked with each other. She had known this all along and yet, even now, after the battle has been long over, she tries to desperately come up with a solution that could have spared Robin’s life.  
  
She shakes her head in dismay. “If I could only travel back in time…!” She could have changed so many things: prevent her aunt Emmeryn’s assassination, her parents’ death, Robin getting controlled by that dragon, protect her friends…  
  
It is no use, the more she thinks about it the more she wants to cry. Grima was right. If she had just let Robin go away, then none of this would have ever happened.  
  
She weeps silently inside the peaceful graveyard. The sun is shining bright and the trees bloom in all the different colors as the birds sing loudly to greet the spring. It is a beautiful day and the more beauty she notices in it, the more lament she feels.  
  
Suddenly, a hand is placed on her shoulder. “Even if you had known all this beforehand, the decision would have been too cruel for a child to make.” Owain’s voice says and from the corner of her eye she notices him kneeling down next to her. “The single life of a loved one, who had been parent and friend alike against the lives of your other friends and the people of Ylisse?” He shakes his head. “Be glad that you didn’t know and were able to follow your heart.”  
  
“I abandoned all of you.” Lucina whispers. She can’t look into his eyes, even though she knows he doesn’t blame her. She feels not worthy enough to still have a living family member left after all the mistakes she made. “If I had returned at least a little bit sooner, Aunt Lissa wouldn’t have…!”  
  
Owain just squeezes her shoulder, prompting her to look up. To her surprise he is smiling.  
“She is always with me.” He says and shows her something he is holding in his other hand. It is a piece of broken wood; Lucina recognizes the cut-off engraving as words from the Holy Book. “Is this…?”  
  
He nods. “Part of her staff. I… I actually named it after her.”  
  
“You still believe in the power of naming things?” Lucina asks and wipes her tears away.  
  
“I’m sure this is the sole reason I am able to be beside you right now.” He answers and gets on his feet again. “Mother is protecting me, no matter where she is.”  
  
Lucina looks up to him and sees him smile against the blue sky. There is melancholy in his grey eyes that resemble so much Lissa’s – but no sadness is within them. “I wish I could believe the same.” She replies and stands up too. There is no point in staying further in the graveyard if she can’t come up with anything to say to the dead.  
  
“Aren’t you already? Or why else would you still don her coat?” Owain asks and she stops in her tracks.  
  
Lucina gazes at the lilac fabric that she wears over her shoulders as she thinks about Owain’s words. She touches it fondly and then rests her hand on the Falchion. Two very different things that remind her of the two persons that shaped her into the woman she is now. It stands to reason why she can’t let go of the family heirloom, the sword forged of one of the divine dragon goddess’s fangs, but the Plegian coat? Wearing it comforts her.  
  
Maybe Owain is right after all. Maybe Robin and her father are protecting her.  
  
And maybe, wherever she is they will be there too.


End file.
